Stepping Stones

Posted on November 10, 2013, in Grief and Trauma

Getting a Perspective About Your Future

It has been said that an unexamined life is not worth living! Nowhere is this more important than in a military family. Your life is exemplary and beyond most of the challenges any civilian has experienced. One of the best ways to recapture life and your place in it is to examine your life from the very beginning, in small steps. Somewhere in your whole life you will find a thread that brought you to who you are today. You will see why you are in a military family. You will find you have been at choice to do certain things and there were roads not taken. Do you want to recapture events you did not take before? You can do that now. Have you ever wondered what your destiny was as you lived your life?  What strengths do you have?

Read: "Your Own Damn Life"

Pause when you read about the vet who became a musician after his service. He recaptured his passion that was left behind while serving in the military. The following exercise is to help you identify some of your passions, maybe a road not taken you can explore now. One of the greatest rewards of having a written history of your life is the readily-available reminders you can access during challenging times, those times when you encounter episodes of feeling like we have accomplished little or lived an insignificant life. Moments of frustration are a universal experience. However, when you have a written history you can refer to your timeline of how you experienced, accomplished, survived and thrived. We all have lessons we’ve previously learned that we use to solve our present dilemmas. It is probably buried already in our life history.

Write: Steppingstones are a list of life events written like a laundry list. Study the example below and write your own version of the Steppingstones in Your Life so far on the next page. Write quickly and freely; no sequencing is necessary; repeating something is all right. As you write, consider the question: Where am I now in the movement of my life? What is waiting to be recaptured and brought forward?

SS 1

SS 2

So what do you do with your life steppingstones? Look at the opportunities, the choices, the experiences you had, the things you didn’t do that you regret. What were/are your talents? What were your inclinations as a child/teen? What did other people admire about you? Then write for 5-10 minutes using the following sentence stems:

Sentence Stems: I became the person I am because... A road not taken that I can recapture now is...I am going to imagine a future in which...The ability I have that I want out now is...

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