Some Things to Do if You or Your Child is Experiencing Worry

Posted on October 23, 2013, in Stress and Anxiety

Worry is a form of fear. It certainly is a normal reaction given the traumatic experience you or your child have been exposed to recently. Some people who have everything going for them sometimes worry that the bottom will fall out of their world.
Worry too, is the result of feeling vulnerable and powerless. Worry, like a thunderstorm, never comes to stay; it too, leaves in time. Sometimes our worry is beyond our control because we can’t always influence or change what others are doing. We can’t stop the rain from raining. Sometimes we can’t stop the worry.

The least helpful thing to do about worry is to do nothing. It’s like having plans to do something outside, it rains, and your plans are canceled. Instead of changing your plans and doing something else, you sit and look out the window at the rain. The longer you sit, the more depressed you will get.

If, after answering the following questions, there are no additional actions to take about that worry, then it is important to just let the worry be and engage in the other activities. You might as well as the worry isn’t going anywhere soon. You don’t have to let it stop you from having fun, taking care yourself and of other responsibilities. The reality is, by changing your focus and pursuing other activities, the worry eventually takes care of itself. Remember, worry is not a permanent condition. As you begin to feel strong because of other things you are doing with your life, the worry becomes smaller, or no longer a worry.

How to Relieve Worry

Children worry when their parents worry. The following can help relieve your worry as well as your child's.

  • What is your biggest worry?
  • On a scale of 1-5, 5 being the most severe, how severe is your worry? 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5
  • What specifically would make your worry go away?
  • Can you directly initiate or prevent what would make your worry go away/happen?
  • What can’t you control about the factors of your worry?
  • Has what worries now worried you before? (Is your worry now the same as your worry before?)
  • Has it happened to anyone you know?
  • If the answer to the previous two questions is yes, what did you do after the worry happened?
  • Did this worry destroy you or did you, in time, find a way to go on with life?
  • Can you accept that there are some things in life we can’t control, predict, or prevent?
  • Can you accept that all we can control is what we choose to do when something happens?
  • If your worry did happen to come true, what exactly would you do to survive and not let that incident beat you down? List what you would do.
  • How will you know when your worry is eliminated?
  • What are you going to do now that there is no more to do about your worry? List these and take action.

NOTE: If your worry persists and occupies a lot of your time and energy, you need to ask for help from a trauma consultant.

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